Cold Heartless Cash

Have you heard about the new coins that are sans the inscription "In God We Trust"?

Gee, won't "In God We Trust" being removed from currency insult all of those businesses out there making money hand over fist? I bet that all foreign and domestic money advisors and business owners will close their doors and stop trading in US currency to show their spiritual resolve! And I'm not even sure that strippers will continue to let people put money in their G-strings if we eventually take these words off the loot. Who wants a five spot rubbing against your bumper and grinder if it is not "sanctified"?!

Only... now that the slogan is being removed, and people are boycotting... should we worry that our whole economy might fail? People might think Americans don't trust in God now. (Except those heathens who have the audacity to practice a different religion or philosophy that does not recognize the Christian/Judaeic God-Head as ominpotent.) So... good idea boycotting this new money (even though it would actually be recognizing the rights given to us in our Constitution to practice religious freedom in this country!!)

I especially enjoy how this "In God We Trust" thing has been used by our elected leader George W. Bush to wage war on enemies and simulataneously compromise our global reputation with our planetary neighbors. I think "W" has really contemplated the deeper meaning of the teachings "love thy enemy" and "love thy neighbor" and therefore is practically a prophet in his revelation that those beliefs must be interpreted as bomb the be-Jesus out of other countries (and just lie if you need to justify it - you've already breeched that "thou shalt not kill" thing so how bad could lying be?) Besides it could profit the US in the long run by having dominion over the holy land, er I mean over oil rich soil. And if Haliburton or our personal family ties benefit as well... BONUS (that covers honor thy mother and father right?)!!!

So print me up some MORE cash and coinege that CLEARLY proves "In God We Trust"!!! As a matter of fact let's remove the faces of those old presidents and just print God's face right there on the durned bills! (Anybody know what God looks like? Gosh, makes you wonder, if Jesus was the son of God and was from the area of the world that Americans are now bombing... how does anybody know we aren't bombing his present incarnation, or his descendant relatives? My bet is that he never did have reddish brown hair and white skin as presently portrayed in the majority of American Jesus iconography, what with being from Nazareth and all?)

Back to my point though...

It is probably better that these new "godless" coins not be allowed to fit into coke machine slots (apparently a potential problem with changing coins now that there are a gazillion machines out there that won't recognize them!) Besides, people might continue to purchase products like Coke "Black" which is clearly destabilizing the white supremecy in this country... or "Cherry Coke" which is a reminder that chastity is absolutely necessary until marriage (and don't worry we will clearly define marriage for you as well) so that you can be a pure soul. (Of course we all know where we stood on THOSE particular moral issues through the years... anyone remember college? Anybody have any inter-racial or same gender pre-marital experiences to share with the class...?)

This seperation of "God" from the money thing... it's just taking personal rights too far! We all know that any "God" worth his pillar of salt would want to be deified in materialism as opposed to worshipped quietly in the hearts of devotees!

[*****FLASH*****]

Well folks, my sarcasm could continue... but lightning just struck awfully close to where I am standing, so- in the interest of trusting that God missed on purpose... I gotta run...

May the peace of your inner Buddha manifest in you [****THUNDERCLAP*****] okay, okay (crossing fingers behind back)... In God we Trust!

Love ya'll like a shiny new Quarter that has the state on it you were looking for!
Love,
Joy Beagle

Business is a B_tch

Well hey ya'll! Thanks for dropping by my little ole site again (or welcome if you are new!)

Your girl Joy Beagle has been working her claws to the pad these days. I have decided that my entrepreneural attitude has GOT to birth some new projects... or else I will go stir crazy in this dog eat dog world. So, Miss Sarah Basset and I have cooked up a little fun for the readers.

Now don't click away thinking this is a re-run. I know this will SOUND very familiar to begin with. Our first attempt at this failed, due to our lack of thinking it through, but HEY...we are dogs!

So we are considering revisiting the Bistro idea... BUT WITH A NEW PLAYER! Bistro never surfaced again, though Chris assures us that no harm came to him. The readers chose a worthy first trip... but it was a young couple with a brand new baby, visiting parents (they stayed a month) and then the Bistro hosts had to pack and move to a new home. I know how chaotic OUR LIVES got when the boys moved us to our new house... so in the vain of a total pardon... we are wiping the slate clean and starting anew!

I will soon introduce you all to Huckleberry, a product of Sarah and I tampering with cloning and gene splicing! You won't believe the result!

Suffice it to say we feel it more appropriate to send this dog to a READER of Bone-appetit this time and therefore better our chances of participation. [The element of surprise apparently didn't have the bang we had originally hoped!]

So... purse your lips, close your eyes and hold your breath for part II of our saga.

Love ya'll like posing for Chris to snap me with his picture phone!

Love,
Joy Beagle (and sidekick Sarah)

Fun with Dots!

Hey ya'll!

Miss Sarah Basset and I have been lazing around in all this Arizona Snow. Who knew that we would have such a wet and white winter this year? I had to laugh when I read on the web news the other day that 13% of Americans had no idea what the term "global warming" meant. Let Ms. Beagle put it in a nutshell:

It means you get lots of snow in places that are the "desert" like Arizona! (hee, hee.)

Anyway, I am no expert on the topic... but since Sedona is such an international destination, my proof positive is all the visitors that come here and tell my Dads (both in retail and thus both seeing LOTS of people from all over) how weird the weather is EVERYWHERE!

Granted, we don't want to go into Chicken Little mode: "The SKY is FALLING, THE SKY is FaLliNg!!!" But I sure do hope people will pay some attention to this global phenomenon. I mean forget politics honey. Just think of your puppies, kittens, human kids, nieces and nephews! They gotta keep truckin along on this planet no matter WHAT their political affiliation is. So I think of it like this:

When that Hurricane wiped us out in New Orleans... I was only about 7 months old (my vet guesses). So, if all goes well and I live to be 12, 15 or 17 (pretty good for pups these days)... that means I got a LOT of mileage to get our of this earth yet! I watch Chris fret over how infrequently he services his car, or gets his health checkups... or takes my 8 year old Basset sister to the vet. If we go to such trouble to maintain individual mechanical and medical upkeep... how much MORE concerned should he be about this rock we live on - hurling through space and inhabited by 77.7 BILLION humans alone!!! (Can't even GUESS at numbers of other species...) So let's do a visual: here is 100 dots:

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Here is 1000 dots:

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here is 10,000 dots:


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So we would need that last section to be multiplied 7,770 more times to represent the human population alone. (Imagine how long you would have to scroll to get through this post if I pasted that!)

My simple little dog brain is thinking WE ALL gotta pitch in a little bit to even put a slight slow down on the effects we are having on this planet! Imagine if every one of those dots, er I mean PEOPLE, recylced ONE MORE can, or box this year. Or shared one more ride... or donated one more penny to an environmental cause. That TINY effort multiplied by all those dots.... well, suddenly changing the world seems a bit more doable as an individual!!!

Okay folks... all this philosophy has cut into my nap time. So I'm gonna grab a chewie and head for the nearest open chair to snooze a bit. I hope ya'll will explore the Internet (especially pet-authored sites) and get your finger on the pulse of what all those animals are out there blogging about! We got our work cut out for us to inspire all you dots. Um, again, I mean humans!

Love ya'll like a perfect punctuation mark.

Love,
Joy Beagle

Here's a related article:

By SETH BORENSTEIN, AP Science Writer 12 minutes ago
PARIS - A panel of international scientists predicted Friday that global warming will continue for centuries no matter how much people control pollution, in a bleak report that blamed humans for killer heat waves, devastating droughts and stronger storms.

The report said people were "very likely" the cause of global warming — the
strongest conclusion to date — and placed the burden on governments to take
action. "It's later than we think," said Susan Solomon, co-chair of
Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change. Man-made emissions of greenhouse
gases are to blame for fewer cold days, hotter nights, heat waves, floods and
heavy rains, droughts and stronger storms, particularly in the Atlantic Ocean,
the 21-page report said.

It highlighted "increases in global average air and ocean temperatures, widespread melting of snow and ice, and rising global mean sea level." Authors of the report called it conservative: It used only peer-reviewed published science and was edited by representatives of 113 governments who had to agree to every word. It was a snapshot of where the world is with global warming and where it is heading, but does not tell governments what to do.

Yet if nothing is done, the world is looking at billions of dollars in costs adapting to a warmer world over the next century, co-author Kevin Trenberth said in an interview. He also warned of at least 1 million deaths in droughts, floods and hurricanes. The study said no matter how much civilization slows or reduces its greenhouse gas emissions, global warming and sea-level rise will continue for centuries.

"This is just not something you can stop. We're just going to have to live with it," said Trenberth, the director of climate analysis at the U.S National Center for Atmospheric Research. "We're creating a different planet. If you were to come back in 100 years' time, we'll have a different climate."

Scientists fear world leaders will take that message in the wrong way and throw up their hands, Trenberth said. Instead, the scientists urged leaders to reduce emissions and adapt to a warmer world with wilder weather. "The point here is to highlight what will happen if we don't do something and what will happen if we do something," said another author, Jonathan Overpeck of the University of Arizona. "I can tell you if you decide not to do something the impacts will be much larger than if we do something."

"The next step is up to public officials, scientists said. "It is critical that we look at this report ... as a moment where the focus of attention will shift from whether climate change is linked to human activity, whether the science is sufficient, to what on earth are we going to do about it," U.N. Environment Program Executive Director Achim Steiner said.

The strongly worded report put pressure on the Bush administration to reduce the
United States' growing share of gases that trap heat in the atmosphere. The White House issued a statement less than four hours after the report's release defending
President Bush's six-year record on climate change. It said Bush and his budget
proposals have devoted $29 billion to climate-related science, technology,
international assistance and incentive programs — "more money than any other
country." Bush has called for slowing the growth rate of U.S. greenhouse gas
emissions, which averages 1 percent a year, but has rejected government-ordered
reductions.

Since 1990, U.S. greenhouse gas emissions have gone up 16 percent. The Bush administration has rejected the Kyoto Protocol, which calls for cuts in emissions of greenhouse gases. Sharon Hays, White House associate science adviser, called the study "a significant report. It will be valuable to policy makers."

Another report by the panel later this year will address the most effective measures for slowing global warming. If it looks bad now, the harmful effects during the 21st century "would very likely be larger than those observed during the 20th century," the report said. The panel predicted temperature rises of 2-11.5 degrees Fahrenheit by the year 2100. It said its best estimate was for temperature rises of 3.2-7.1 degrees. On sea levels, the report projects rises of 7-23 inches by the end of the century. An additional 3.9-7.8 inches are possible if recent, surprising melting of polar ice sheets continues.

The panel, created by the United Nations in 1988, releases its assessments every five or six years, though scientists have been observing aspects of climate change since as far back as the 1960s. The reports are released in phases — this is the first of four this year. The projected effects of global warming would vary in different parts of the globe. The closer to the poles, the higher the temperature spikes, the
study said. Dramatic temperature spikes are likely to be seen within 22
years in most of the Northern Hemisphere, the report showed. Northern Africa and
other places will see dramatically less rainfall. The United States could
see a 10-degree temperature rise by the end of the century and a more arid south
and west, Overpeck said.

And that's just average temperature increases and rainfall amounts, something that doesn't affect people much. The harshest consequences of global warming are the heat waves, droughts, floods, and hurricanes, said study co-author Philip Jones of Britain's University of East Anglia. And those have increased dramatically in the past decade and will get worse in the future, he said. Global warming could eventually lead to an "ice-free Arctic," warned Gerry Meehl, an official with the U.S National Center for Atmospheric Research. And when that happened 125,000 years ago, seas
rose between 13 and 20 feet. That is looking like a real possibility for the 22nd Century, the report said, though some scientists fear much of it could happen before the end of the century.

Trenberth said the world is paying more attention to scientists now than to previous warnings in 1990, 1995 and 2001. "The tension is more now," he said. As the IPCC report was being released, environmental activists rappelled off a Paris bridge and draped a banner over a statue used often as a popular gauge of whether the Seine River is running high.

"Alarm bells are ringing. The world must wake up to the threat," said Catherine Pearce of Friends of the Earth.
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Associated
Press writer Angela Charlton contributed to this report.